I'm back....

For my faithful followers (all 6 or 7), I've chosen to return to the blogging scene. I've been away for 2 reasons:

1. I've been completely swamped since the school year started and have had literally no free time.
2. I've been so bitter and angry lately that I was afraid any post I made would turn off whatever readers I had.

So, here I am. Four months later. Slightly less bitter. I have a week off from school for Thanksgiving, and by God, we're gonna get some blogging done!

For my first post since my absence, I will re-examine my original blogging goals:

1. Spend quality time with my children every day. (I really do try. I'm less stressed out in the mornings because now I don't have to be to work til 9am. So, that helps. We can sit together and enjoy breakfast. On the weekends, we try to do fun things as a family.)
   
2. Average reading a book a week. (Now this, I'm very good about. Reading has become one of my only outlets. And depending on the length of the book, I AM averaging about one a week. So, you're wondering..."You can read, but not blog?" And the answer is an emphatic, "YES!")
   
3. Stick to my new workout schedule. (Ummm...not so much. I certainly work out on the weekends, but I'm lucky if I get one workout in during the week. It should be easier in a couple of weeks once all my plays are over with. No more after school rehearsals...yay!)
   
4. Write on this blog at least once a week. (Well, you know the answer to that one. I will try to do better, though, for the reason listed below.)

So, I'm human....shoot me.

If you've followed my blog from the beginning, you know that I would like to be able to work from home. The online school thing still isn't happening for me. But, due to all my reading, I've become very passionate about reading and writing. I'm way more critical and analytical than I've ever been. I've actually found quite a few jobs for at-home writers. The problem is, they all want a writing sample. Aside, from this blog and college papers (for which I'd have to search to find hard copies in the garage), I don't have any samples. I'd like to create 2 samples, one creative writing, the other more editorial. Any suggestions?

A Day in the Life of Melanie

When I picked the girls up from school today, Melanie and I went into Belle's room to get her. Her class was on the playground. She looks around and says:

"Where is Belle? Where's my freakin' sister?"

The teacher walked in on the end of the conversation as I was telling her that Mommy and Daddy sometimes say words that little girls shouldn't say. I'm expecting my Mother of the Year plaque in the mail any day now.

At least she used the word properly in the sentence.

As I was laying down with Melanie tonight she let one rip. I pinched my nose and coughed. She says:

"Does it smell like rotten eggs?"

Me: "Yes"

"No, It doesn't. My heiny is beautiful."

Then she was feeling a little love of country.


Play ball!

Tori and Beth, BFF

Not by a long shot...but it got your attention.

So, Abby and I went to the Tori Spelling book signing at the Barnes and Noble on Dale Mabry last night (7/20). I watch her reality show occasionally and read bits and pieces of her first book. I thought, "What the hell?" I mean, it's a book signing, which is cool in and of itself. And come on...Donna Martin?!? Of course, I'm going.

I put some thought into my wardrobe. I settled on a dress that Chad bought for me. I hadn't worn it yet. I feel a little ridiculous for caring so much.

When Chad got home from work, I asked him, "Do I look stupid? I feel like I'm trying too hard."

"No, you don't look stupid. What's stupid is that you're going to see Tori Spelling."

Standard heterosexual male response. Most of the guys there last night were gay.

We left as early as we could for Tampa. I had to wait for Chad to get home to watch the girls. She wasn't set to arrive until 7:30pm, but the store started handing out wrist bands at 2:30pm. Our feeling was, "Whatever...if we see her, we see her. If not, hey, night out."

We get there at about 5:45. Not many people. I'm surprised. We went in to get bands. We're told that ours are the 2nd set of bands given out (the green ones), which didn't guarantee anything. I'm #1037. I'm not optimistic at this point. Around 7:15, the flood gates open and in come the PURPLE wrist bands.

They called for numbers 1-50. Oh boy, this is going to be a long night.

She's running late. I'm thinking, typical Tori. But apparently, she'd been live on HSN in St. Pete until 7pm. Forgiven.

We sat down at the cafe and waited. I knew she'd arrived when I heard peals of screams. I did some scouting and found a spot in the fiction aisle where we could catch a glimpse. We got a couple of pics. They then call for numbers 51-60. Come on!

"It's 9 o'clock. Let's eat."

At 10pm we swing back by to see if progress has been made. She was only slated for 7:30-9:30pm. They're on number 200 or so. I find another photo op spot and snap away. I felt a little dirty, like paparazzi. I mean, she's about 10 feet from me (on another side of a barricade) and I'm filming her every move. She seemed really cool and was taking a lot of time with each person...talking to them and taking pictures. Yeah, she's not making it to #1037.

A super fan was standing next to me. She sees my green wrist band and remarks, "I heard they're probably going to end up kicking you guys out."

REALITY CHECK, bitch.
a. This event is not going to make or break me, I'll live. (I know that statement probably goes against most of what I've already written, especially the bit about all the pictures.) and
b. They won't have to kick me out because my ass will be long gone. It's way past my bedtime. I got my book and my pictures.


We left shortly thereafter. I read today on her Twitter that she signed until 2:20am. So, we missed her. I actually have a lot of respect for that. She was live on air on HSN from 2-4am early Tuesday morning. Then live again from 5-7pm. Then at the book signing from 7:45pm-2:20am.

Two questions top my list:
1. How did she keep her makeup looking fresh? and
2. Did she have to go the bathroom, and if she did, she use the same one as the rest of us peons?

It was a fun time, nonetheless. I started reading the book, Uncharted TerriTORI. It's good. She's actually a decent writer. [EDIT:  I never finished the book.  I got caught up in the hype.]

As US Weekly Magazine would report: "She's Just Like Us."














Don't Judge Me.

I'm a Star, Bitches!

Or, my former student is.

Miles Teller, LHS 2005 grad and former student of yours truly, has just been cast as "Willard" in the remake of Footloose. Why is this significant? Because I was the GENIUS who originally cast him in this part in 2003. He even says as much:

"You, my dear, are a casting director in waiting, and I can't wait for the story of how all of this happened to come out! Who would've guessed that one little musical could've completely changed my direction in life and jump-started what I believe to be a long road of success." -Miles Teller, 6/22/2010

He's been very kind about crediting me with getting him started. But to watch his recent work, you'd know that he is naturally gifted and an honest actor. It gives me goosebumps to think I had even a morsel to do with all this.

He stays loyal and always informs me personally of his roles. We're still waiting for the indy-film, Rabbit Hole, to come out maybe sometime this Fall. That one stars Nicole Kidman.

Footloose is set to hit theaters in Spring 2011.

Here is an article and press release.

I won't embarrass him with a picture of his original portrayal.

Simple Cause and Effect

This



















causes this,















which, in turn, leads to this.



















Time for a new couch.

Well, Ain't That Some Shit?

So, we went to the girls' first swim lesson last night. It started at 7pm at Bicentennial Pool. We got there early and were the first to arrive. As we walked up to the gate, we were greeted with a sign that read the pool was closed due to "contamination." We actually already knew the situation because a lifeguard told us in the parking lot. Another lady and her two children walked up right behind us. She was Hispanic and spoke broken English. A swim instructor walked over to us and tried to explain gingerly what the problem was. Lady wasn't getting it. Finally the instructor stops dancing around the topic and blurts, "someone pooped in the pool."

Well, that sent my girls over the edge. They laughed like it was the most hilarious thing they'd ever heard. Melanie is repeating "somebody pooped in the pool." Belle is pulling one of her favorite tricks: she's bent over at the waist, hands behind her back, making farting sounds. Melanie joins in. More people are walking up at this point. Everyone is crystal clear on the situation now as my girls are providing illustrations.

Melanie wouldn't shut up about poop in the pool the entire ride home. Why is poop talk so funny to a 4-year-old?


I told Chad, "See, I did everyone at Adventure Island a favor by not reporting my incident. Nobody missed out on the fun."

Shameless Plug

Since I know that you, my many (if many can be defined as more than 3) followers are literate and enjoy reading, I thought I'd throw you a tip.

Start reading the Rizzoli and Isles Thrillers by Tess Gerritsen. I started with The Surgeon, which is the first in the series. I downloaded it to my Kindle because it was only $1.99 and sounded interesting. I couldn't put it down. Then I read The Apprentice, which was just as good. Now I'm on The Sinner. There are 8 in the series.

Jane Rizzoli is the only woman Homicide Detective in the Boston Police Department. Maura Isles is a medical examiner. They work together on cases. Rizzoli is tough as nails and puts up a macho front. Isles is well put together and no nonsense. Other recurring characters are the members of the Homicide unit. Every book has a different murder mystery. Isles isn't in the first book. She is introduced in the second, but doesn't play a major role until the third. I get the feeling that the author didn't originally intend to write a series, but kept on writing because the characters were so popular. The books have crime, suspense, thrill, forensics, romance, but best of all, really solid characters. They're like crack. I'm hooked.

The series is being made into a drama on TNT called Rizzoli and Isles starting this July. Here is a conversation with Tess Gerritsen about the series.



This is her website.

When I read a really good book, I want others to read it too so we can talk about it. I'd loan it out, but that's the one downside of a Kindle.

Enjoy!

5 am. Oh, How I Hate Thee.

Belle has a nasty habit of climbing into our bed somewhere between 3-5am. We've been lazy about curtailing this because of work. Now, that I'm off, this has to stop. When Chad gets up for work, she's up and wants her "ceweeal." Translation = I'm up at 5am on my "summer break."

Melanie got up unusually early this morning as well.

Aside from being tired, I don't mind getting up really early. I can usually do some reading and hop on the internet while they watch their morning programs.

This morning, however, was go time.

A transcript of my dialogue with Melanie:

I'm on the computer.

“Hi, Mommy. Can I stand here by you?”

“Sure, baby. What is that smell? Is that my….? BELLE! Melanie, why didn’t you tell me?” Probably because she helped. Belle is covered head-to-toe in lotion.

“Mommy! Belle has makeup!

“Thank you for telling me, baby.” I lock everyone, including myself, out of my bathroom.

“Mommy! Belle has a marker!”

“Mommy! Belle has Chapstick! I told on her 3 times.” I hate that f'ing kitchen drawer. It’s an abyss of shit toddlers should never touch.

“Mommy! Belle has nail polish!”

“Mommy! Belle has nail polish again!” Benny Hill music should be playing. We're all repeating the same cyclical motions. Belle goes into her bathroom; hauls said item out to the living room. I walk over to her. She hands me said item. I put it out of reach ( I think.)

“Mommy! Belle has more lotion!” I lock us all out of their bathroom. I’ll pick both bathroom locks later.

Time is now 6:45 am.

I hear a chair being dragged across the tile. This means she wants something completely (or so I think) out of reach.

Oh no you didn’t! She’s messing with my Kindle.

Looks like we’re going to school early today.

How can you be mad at this face, though?

Just When You Want to Kill Them...

They go and do something sweet and angelic. 

Mayhem

This week's events:

Melanie slathered body lotion in Belle's hair.

Which was followed by their favorite pastime, rifling through my drawers.

Yes, that's a tampon.

No, it has not been used.

Yes, I was here when this happened.

Belle also flushed a 3 inch hard fishing lure down my toilet. In a slow motion "NOOOOOOOOOO," I fished in after it (pardon the pun). Away it swirled.

A few days ago, they'd gone into the refrigerator, taken out the ham for dinner, hauled it into my bedroom, and were jumping on it.

Yesterday morning, they kept getting into the freezer. I found Melanie with a tub of ice cream in the living room. They each helped themselves to a popsicle. The coup de grace was a bag of frozen chicken on the living room carpet.

My solution.

Their response.

I'm thinking of full-time preschool during the summer.

Isn't it Ironic?

Literally a few hours after I finally signed my contract for next school year (the Teamsters would have been proud of my 3-week holdout), I got another job offer. I don't think I'm going to accept.

It's a tutor coordinator for an SES tutoring company. I'd be in charge of student and tutor recruitment in 3 counties, including Citrus. The work is from home, which is good. The biggest negative is that the pay isn't consistent. It's based on the number of students enrolled. If I were to leave my current job, I'd need to be guaranteed a certain salary with a set number of hours.

I'm still waiting to hear if my request to work 3/4 time will be approved. Things don't look optimistic. I'd take a pay cut, but wouldn't report to work until 9:00am. I'd teach the same number of classes, but with no planning period. The Union has issues with that. If I didn't sign the contract soon, it was going to expire. I may have been out of a job altogether.

I feel like the only way I could justify leaving is if a full-time virtual teaching position came my way.

The mornings aren't getting any easier, though. Even going in 30 minutes later (students are gone), we had a meltdown over socks, or something insignificant like that. Yesterday, I asked Melanie why she was crying. She said she didn't know. I don't either. At least she's honest.

At any rate, today was my last day. I don't report back (maybe) until August 2.

I Loves Me Kindle

I got a Kindle for my birthday. At first I resisted giving in to this technology. I like the feeling of holding a book in my hand. I love walking through the aisles of a bookstore and having covers jump out at me. I like to count the pages I've read and determine how far along I am. You can't get these feelings with an ebook...or can you?

I also have some little idiosyncrasies when it comes to reading books.

1. I don't like reading hardbacks. They are too cumbersome to hold and carry in a purse.
2. I am very particular about the condition of a book. I much prefer new books. To see a book whose pages have been turned down to mark a spot or whose front cover has been folded back makes me cringe.
3. I don't like library books, mainly for the two reasons listed above. Plus, think about how many people have sneezed directly into a library book.
4. Finally, I'm very particular about a book's font. If it is too small, it hurts my eyes.

For the past several months, I have been on a reading kick. And since I have a new book fetish, I have run out of space on my bookshelf. I just took a load of books to a used bookstore, and they've already piled up again.

I also need instant gratification. I buy a lot of books on Amazon (since there is no new bookstore in my area...gasp!) The problem is, it takes a week to get the book.

So......for all of these reasons, I've bought a Kindle. I used my birthday money (yes, even 36 year-old's get money in cards.) Now, I can:

• get instant gratification with a 1-click download that is immediately transferred
• store 1000's of books
• control the font size

I was afraid the screen would hurt my eyes, but it doesn't at all. It is not back lit like a computer. If you're reading in the dark, you still need a light.

Best of all, I bought a case for it and you can hold the case just like a book.

As for roaming through bookstores, I can still do that (if I'm ever in a real city.) I can just download the Kindle version straight from my device. There also is no rule prohibiting me from reading "real" books. Let's be honest, for the longest time, the bookstore I most often frequent has been Amazon.

Instead of pages, I now count in percentages. Because you can change the size of the font, the number of pages in a book can change. Instead, the Kindle tells you the percentage of the book you've read. You can also see how far along you are into a chapter, for those who don't like to stop reading until you've come to the end of one.

I just finished reading my first Kindle book today, The Surgeon by Tess Gerritsen. It was AWESOME, but that's a separate post. Read my Shelfari review. I feel like I read so much faster with the Kindle. I also might read different types of books than I'd normally choose because Amazon offers specials, which is how I ended up with The Surgeon.

That's my review.

Calgon, Take Me Very Far Away

I can't take it anymore. Belle and I and doing battle. One of us is not going to make it out of this summer alive. A jar of petroleum jelly this morning. A bottle of nail polish this afternoon. Both on my couch! I'm losing my sanity. Nothing is safe in this house from her clutches. There are just not enough beers in my refrigerator.

Comments

P.S. If you want to comment on any of my posts, you have to click on the post-it note at the top right corner of the post itself.

Sharpies Should be Outlawed

Today's Pros:
1. I finished all my grading for the semester.
2. My final exams are written and copied.

Today's Cons:

1.  This

2.  and this

3.  and this

4. and this

5.  AND THIS!!!!!!!

and 6. (not pictured) Belle emptied the bubble bath onto the bathroom floor this morning and was covered in it. I left it, as I was (once again) 15 minutes late. At least the house smelled baby fresh when we got home. This seemed like a really big deal until #1-5 occurred.

Hopefully, the marks on her face will be gone by tomorrow morning. Yes, the marker's permanent. Thank God for the Mr. Clean magic eraser. I got it off the tile, but not the grout.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls

We took Melanie and Belle to the Carson and Barnes Circus last night. They LOVED it! Melanie rode an elephant and a camel. Poor little Belle had to sit it out again. Maybe next year. The circus itself was actually entertaining. It was nice to see so many people who came out to support an American tradition...let's not get into the animal rights issues.

The human performers were very entertaining. There was an aerialist that was incredible. At one point, a guy lost his footing during one event and almost fell. People shrieked in terror. That's not helping, people. It reminded of the movie, The Greatest Show on Earth, though not as dangerous or spectacular.

It made me think about the circus performers and their backgrounds. One girl performed a hula hoop routine. She had to have been a rhythmic gymnast. I also couldn't believe the number of kids and dogs who were milling around their trailers. Do they have a tutor? The kids, I mean. I don't envy that life. They were loaded up, and the last trailers were pulling out this morning as I left for work at 7am.


At any rate, it was a fun time.

I Work, Therefore I am Not

I have 9 days left of school this year. I cannot tell you how happy I'll be on May 28th. Going back to work was probably a mistake...at least in terms of being a Drama teacher. I used to love it. Now it just takes up whatever spare time I have.

It's not that I mind work. I do not feel I was cut out to be a stay-at-home mom. But a part-time job or one where I could work from home would be ideal. My life from 5:00-7:00am is chaotic, frantic, frustrating, you name it. And it doesn't help that I'm raising two fashionistas.

I've applied to every online school there is. I'm beginning to get a complex that I haven't been hired yet. Ah, if only I could turn back time and change my college major. I'd maybe have more options.

Maybe something will happen this summer.

Recent Pictures of the Girls

Grand Opening

So, several of my friends have started blogs. I though I'd join in. Not that my life is that entertaining or that I think I'm so fabulous that the rest of the world should know my goings on. I am, however, very goal driven. My theory is that if I'm forced to write about my life, I might indirectly become more exciting.

I'm turning 36 in 4 days, hence the title. So, you ask what, "What are you going to do in a year when you're 37?" You might also ask, "Do you actually have any sense?" My answer to both questions: "I don't know." Maybe blogging will be 'so last season' in a year, and I won't have to worry about it.

I have several goals for myself in the next coming months. Hopefully, this blog can keep me focused. In no particular order, I'd like to:

1. Spend quality time with my children every day.
2. Average reading a book a week.
3. Stick to my new workout schedule.
4. Write on this blog at least once a week.

Happy blogging!